MY MENTAL DEPARTURE FROM WATCHTOWER
My name is Cliff (‘Fifth’), 29, I am a 2nd generation Jehovah’s Witness from California, USA. In this article, I share my experience within the Watchtower organization.
I was officially disfellowshipped this year, April 2016. During that time, I began doing independent research about the organization. By June 2016 I was fully awake to the truth about ‘The Truth.’
In the following video I highlight a bit of my background as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses, the numerous ‘privileges’ that I had within the organization, and the events that led to my eventual departure, both physically and mentally.
My aim in making this video is to share my personal story in the hopes of helping others who may find themselves in a similar situation, to help them realize that they are not alone in this conflict. It is my sincere hope that this video is useful to somebody.
#ThinkingWitnesses
Comments (4)
Cliff,
Thank you for sharing your experience. I’m a faded MS. I fully understand how it feels to be abandoned by those that were your “brothers and sisters”. I helped hundreds of families in various ways and they all turned their backs on me in one day. The low point for me was when my own mother refused to come to my wedding. I know about the depression you feel from having your family abandon you because seven men control your families every thought.
I just want to tell you that it does get better. I’m much happier and I am pursuing things that I never would have been allowed to pursue as a Witness. I now have real friends who like me for me, not because I happen to go to the meetings on Sunday at 12:00. (Those people that go on Sunday at 3:00 You may want to take some classes, join some organizations, find ex-JW groups (reddit.com/r/exjw), see a therapist, or even email me. You are not alone. You are not the only dealing with the pain that was caused by the organization. You have more friends than you think.
You will go through a grieving period. You have experienced the death of your entire belief system and the loss of your family and friends. It’s okay to grieve…for a while. Just don’t let it pull you into long term depression.
Reach out if you ever need someone to talk to. Thanks again for your experience.
Thank you for having the courage to share this. I am so sorry you are experiencing the horrible side of the JW religion. I am 13 years out and still struggle daily with my self worth because of the way I am treated by my family. Keep your head up. I know you are destined for great things. Lots of love and respect to you!
I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: Thanks for the video, man.
I especially like the part where you highlight the discrepancy in attitude towards religious intolerance brought out in the Study Edition of the February Watchtower 2016 pp.26-30 ‘Learn From Jehovah’s Loyal Servants.’ Paragraph 7 praises a Witness who shuns her mother for rejecting ‘The Truth,’ while para 17 essentially denigrates non-Witness parents who shun their child for espousing to the Witness faith.
There a deep level of narcissism in that outlook. You treat people one way when it suits you, and then cry foul when you’re treated in kind. It’s twisted how the Watchtower organisation does that. And I’m glad that you picked that up, Cliff, because only a person who is sober in mind and sensitive to detail would have noticed that. And this is what they tried to achieve with this year’s Remain Loyal to Jehovah convention, by presenting this psychologically twisted narrative, loyalty to an organisation veiled as loyalty to God. I wrote about it at length in a previous blog article.
As you say: the irony!
First of all Cliff, God bless you and I commend you for having the strength to do what you knew to be right in your heart. I found your videos as I was looking on the internet for insight into the Jehovah’s Witness religion. The reason being, my wife was raised as a Jehovah’s Witness. I myself am not, and have never been a JW. I was raised Christian and have never strayed from my beliefs. So, you can imagine, faith has been an issue between she and I. We almost broke up more than once because of it. To make a long story short, I decided not to let the fact that I know her to be mislead break us apart. But I would be lying if I said I wasn’t holding out hope that someday her eyes will open. I know that she is in conflict, unsure about her faith. She no longer goes to the Kingdom Hall regularly, and has stated that she isn’t interested in living the strict lifestyle required by the organization. I think the fear of broken familial relationships is a HUGE factor in her refusing to go outside the Watchtower for information. I can say without a doubt that yours, and content from other ex-JWs, has given me a ton of insight into her thought process (or sadly, lack thereof) concerning the religion. Thanks and God bless you!